acne scar traffic revision n:
a detour around a potholed street.
<Daisy was already late, so when she saw the ~ she nearly
lost it.>
anal liposuction n: the
process of trying to get one's fat ass out of a chair <After
a few hours of reading the morning paper, Lloyd began the arduous
procedure of ~.>
atrophy wife n: a
former trophy wife who has seen better days <Nick looked
down at his ~ lying beside the pool, realizing that all those
nips and tucks still couldn't keep back the hands of time.>
Augouraphobia n: 1.
fear of leaving Agoura Hills 2. phobia named after Agoura Hills
[fr. agoraphobia] <The mere thought of the wide expanse
of the 101 Freeway gave Samantha the willies. She had full-fledged
~.>
beach cobbler n:a
shoemaker whose shop is along the boardwalk <Jim had a
small store in Venice, a good fit for a ~.>
bellicose veins n:blood
vessels which burst due to warmongering <All the department
heads could see that Wolfowitz had ~.>
Bev nap n: 1.
a small napkin upon which to rest a beverage in Beverly Hills
2. taking a nap in Beverly Hills <Daisy had been running
around all day; she just had to take a quick ~.>
bikini waxing eloquent n:
highly literate surfer girls <If you got up at dawn and
headed out to Venice Beach, you could always expect to find Bitsy
and Belinda ~ near the ocean.>
bon voyeur n: a
talented Peeping Tom <All winter long, Beverly Hills was
inundated with several ~s who were never, in fact, caught.>
botux n: a
wrinkle-free formal evening suit for men — side effects
may include numbness and loss of expression <Though Lloyd
received many compliments on his ~, he felt oddly detached for
most of the evening.>
bozo filter n: the
head receptionist or gatekeeper <At MegaFilm Corp., no
one ever got past secretary Betty O'Brian — the quintessential
~.>
Brentwood n: a
type of golf club <I'd sure use the ~ on this one, Jim.>
byte n: a
Southland food portion. <Lloyd beheld the miniscule morsel
of food on his plate as the waiter reassured him it consisted
of at least five ~s.>
Calabassas n: a
type of sausage <Toss those ~ on the grill, Jimmy!>californicate
v: when a state gets screwed. <Though Enron tried to ~ other
states, its greatest successes were in California.>
carpool tunnel syndrome n:
a disease which afflicts those in the carpool lane <The
combination of being in a crowded car and going through tunnels
creates a rare medical condition known as ~.>
casting couch potato n:
a director or producer who's not only slimy, but lazy [see SNAIL
MALE] <Daisy knew the audition was a lark when the ~ leered
at her, scratched himself and told her to try the scene again
— on his lap.>
celluloid treatment n:
how one's film is received <Rookie
screenwriter Joey McGuinness really got the ~ when his movie not
only flopped, but he didn't even recognize it as the story he
originally penned.>
chihuaweiler n:
a small dog with delusions of grandeur <Biffy's
~ sure looked tiny, but he walked the block like he owned it.>
—Carole Easton, Venice, Ca.
cig alert n: an
alert which notifies smokers they are no longer welcome <The
Solano Beach City Council issued the first ~ that prohibits smoking
on a California beach.>