Special to The LaLa Times
by Brad Schreiber
SACRAMENTO — California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger
broke a 26-day budget impasse with key state Democrats by calling
them "girlie men" and engaging seven, including Senate
President Pro Tem John Burton in arm wrestling matches.
Echoing a Saturday Night Live TV sketch in which two bodybuilders
with Austrian accents chided weak men, Schwarzenegger putting
the finishing touches on the state’s $103 billion budget
by calling Burton and others in his party not only "girlie
men" but "Wimpocrats and puny, tiny little babies and
stuff."
TESTING POLITICAL MIGHT:
Schwarzenegger's taunts brought the legislature to a halt
as statesmen from both sides of the aisle waged impromptu arm
wrestling bouts.
The opposition was not impressed, insisting that
Schwarzenegger and California Republicans have not only made cuts
to health, education and environmental programs but have borrowed
an additional $5 billion with $1.5 billion more in accounting
tricks which may not save the Golden State any money.
In a move that may not have been entirely spontaneous,
Schwarzenegger stunned the legislature by first appearing in a
Brioni suit but quickly stripping it off, to reveal a Gold’s
Gym tee shirt and workout shorts emblazoned with The Terminator
film slogan "Hasta la vista, baby" over the buttocks.
Uttering the challenge "I will sign off on
anything if you can beat me in arm wrestling," Schwarzenegger
proceeded to force one political leader after another to grapple
with him, whipping each one with ease and forcing many to cry
out in pain, after which he chuckled and, in the case of veteran
politico Burton, referred to him as "an aging, flabby pussy-boy."
Burton, like many of his colleagues, was seen later
in the day sporting a sling for his damaged arm. Certain unnamed
Democratic party officials are investigating whether the Governor
can be charged with assault and battery, since many of those he
arm wrestled did not agree verbally to do so.
Asked how he conceived of the stunt that would resolve the budget
negotiations for the fifth largest economy in the world, Schwarzenegger
replied, "It was very difficult and tricky, too, you know?
My first idea was to bring in a prop gun from one of The Terminator
movies and threaten to shoot them if they didn’t agree.."
IT'S UNANIMOUS!: Schwarzenegger's
strong-armed tactics are paying off.